Friday, September 5, 2014

Saying Goodbye

For the entire month of August, I just didn't let myself think about it beyond the facts.

For the last two weeks, I just focused on anything else that took my mind off of it.

Over the weekend I was busy getting things ready, so I was too busy to think about it.

Tuesday came. Miss V came. It was a good visit, with laughing and smiling, and questions asked and answered, and Kit played with her, and smiled and made us laugh like usual. But it was different, and we felt it. I didn't let myself go there, because I didn't want to break down, not that it would have been the first time in front of her (nor the second, or third, or even fourth probably.) 

And then it was time for her to go, and we took some pictures, and all the kids hugged her, and I held Kit on my shoulder on the steps so she could wave goodbye until Miss V is out of sight like she has every week for at least five months. And then we closed the door, and Kit went on with business as usual, because she has no idea nor way to process the change, so I haven't even mentioned it. But at some point I'll have to try to explain, and watch her not understand. 

Later that afternoon, Victor whisked me away to a little cabin in the woods for our anniversary and between playing cards and the raccoon posse that tried to bust into the cabin and actually having no children chiming in on what to watch on t.v., I didn't think about it, I really enjoyed the break from the busy-ness.

But these things always catch up with me. It did a little bit Wednesday night with Miss V's sweet texts that she sent me. But, now, when the house is quiet, and I'm planning out the day tomorrow, and going over the visit from Kit's new teacher today, it's all hitting me.

All of the changes. And the losses. The loss of stability. The loss of her expertise and reassurance. Losing someone whom my daughter had formed a real connection with, responded to, and really looked forward to her visits. Someone who made us feel capable, and cared for.

Part of her role as Kit's Occupational Therapist was also to educate and prepare us as a family and parents to help Kit find and keep her balance as best as possible. She did this and far more.  

When Kit's plan was put in place 10 months ago, I was skeptical that an hour a week with Miss V was going to be enough to really make a difference in the challenges we were facing with Kit. Now I can see how that hour a week with her became somewhat of a lifeline in helping our whole family through some of our toughest moments so far. And it wasn't just because of teaching us techniques to use or her amazing way of working with Kit even for just 15-20 minutes, but the effects of which would last for days. 

It was also that she had a finger on Kit's pulse, and by extension on the rest of the family too. And when a protocol she did with Kit showed results, or the suggestions she made were implemented with success, the ripple effects spread through all of us. In helping Kit find what she needed, all the rest of us seemed to get what we needed to.

So in a way, she was our OT too. And our friend.

And all of that is why I'm typing through tears. Because I'm sad, and have to let go of this special person who helped us accomplish so much in such a short time. And that just because of the way things are, that Kit turning three means transition of services, everything has to change and we have to let go of what has been working so well. 

And the whole thing just sort of sucks, and I've been very mature about the whole thing all summer, and had to be very grown up about this process, and you know what? I'm just going to sit here and have a really good cry about all of this. Because sometimes change is just really really sad!

And once again, I just want to say thank you, to this awesome lady who has made a big big difference in not just one kid's life, but her family as well.

We will miss you so much!


28 comments:

  1. What a lovely, and loving, tribute to Miss V, who truly knows how you feel, and who undoubtedly values that appreciation beyond the knowledge that "its all in the job description". The rewards of some careers go far beyond the salary, and families like yours sum it up.
    Her influence will last, progress will not be lost, skills will be remembered. That also is her contribution.

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  2. Nana is spot on. :)
    And the picture is...well, it's so precious and beautiful. It, too, is spot on. I remember how tightly she later said those tiny arms squeezed her and I'd like to think that saying goodbye was simply transitional into the next step in your journey with her. There is still too much to do. :)

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  3. What a sweet hug!
    You and your wonderful family will all keep working together, as you have been, doing great things. It so great to have some time away from our little monsters :D
    Good job Victor

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  4. What a sweet way to honor someone special in your child's life. This was very sweet!

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    1. Thank you, she is very special to us. Thanks for reading!

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  5. Touching post! I know my sister felt the same way when her favorite OT left. It can be hard to find caring people who really get our kids.

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    1. Thank you. Yes, some people fit just right with our kids, and it is so hard to let them go! I hope your sister has found a few more along their journey.

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  6. What a moving post. Good that she made such a difference, but so sorry she couldn't stay any longer. Popping over from Share With Me.

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    1. Thank you for stopping by and for the sweet comments!

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  7. It is hard when you make a great connection with a therapist and you see your child flourishing and then you have to say goodbye for whatever reasons. I am so glad she helped and I am happy to discover your lovely blog #sharewithme

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    1. So hard indeed! Thanks for reading, I love connecting with other moms and bloggers!

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  8. How wonderful that you had a special connection with your OT. I'm sure this post would mean a lot to her. I hope the next therapist is as good of a fit! #sharewithme

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  9. Oh my goodness, now we're all crying. What an impact this lady has had on your family. It looks to me as though she will be heartbroken too. I imagine she has formed a really special bond with Kit. Change is so hard. I hope that the next step is just as life-changing for you all.

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    1. They really did have such a special bond. I hope we were able to give even a little back of the kindness she gave us. Thank you so much for your sweet comments!

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  10. What a beautiful post - so touching. I truly hope you find another Miss V and wish you allthe very best xx #sharewithme

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    1. Thank you so much for your sweet comments!

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  11. What a beautiful and moving post. Miss. V sounds like a very lovely lady. I hope you find another loving and caring person that has touched your daughter and your family's life like she has. Best wishes to you and your beautiful daughter. Kim @This Ole Mom

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    1. The lovliest! Thank you so much for your kind words, and for stopping by!

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  12. What a lovely post for someone who obviously made a big difference to your family. I can symathise a bit with you, a very good friend moved away last week and we feel empty without her and her girls as we were always doing things together be it toddler group, playdates and the school run, hope things continue to go well. #sharewithme

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    1. Awww...yes, loosing a good friend in anyway is so hard, even when you keep in touch. Thank you for stopping by and such a nice comment!

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  13. Ahhh bless and a lovely tearful post. It is obvious she has really impacted you and your beautiful family in such a great way. Amazing. Thank you so much for linking up to Share With Me. #sharewithme

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    1. Thank you Jenny, she really has and we already miss her so much! Thank you for your sweet comments and taking the time to come by.

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  14. Aw, what a sweet tribute to someone special to your family. And happy anniversary by the way!


    Thank you for stopping by the Thoughtful Spot Weekly Blog Hop this week. We hope to see you drop by our neck of the woods next week!

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