Yesterday, I suddenly saw springtime. As I drove, it was everywhere.
The grass was green!
Azaleas were blooming everywhere!
Buds all over the trees!
Life was literally bursting forth in every direction. And so was my heart!
It was also springtime in my heart! I finally exhaled a breath of relief that I have been holding for years!
Our visit with Dr. N was truly a consolation. While Zak worked on his math in the waiting area, I sat on the edge of her couch and poured out my worries. Only a trickle at first (is she going to think I'm paranoid, obsessed, crazy?), then the more she asked questions and nodded with understanding, the less crazy I felt, the more relaxed I got, and at some point, I felt it. The blossom of hope opening just the slightest bit.
She knew what SPD was. She was very familiar with it's symptoms. She clearly connected how certain activities open up pathways for Zak's mind to accomplish what he is so very capable of. She didn't jump to any conclusions. She didn't diagnose. She listened, she heard, she offered support and further analysis, and after visiting with him for a few minutes to introduce herself to him she said he was a pretty cool kid. I wholeheartedly agree!
When we drove to her office that morning, the fog was so thick we couldn't even see the top of the bridge as we drove over the lake. It was so reflective of how I've felt about this as the years go by, like the fog just gets thicker and I can't seem to see anything except exactly where we are in any given moment.
As we drove home, the clouds were starting to lift. At home I told Victor everything, then lay down to nurse Kit and we both fell into a deep sleep for about two hours.
Later, as I drove alone to orchestra practice, I suddenly saw it, felt it, breathed it.
Spring has definitely arrived!
The grass was green!
Azaleas were blooming everywhere!
Buds all over the trees!
Life was literally bursting forth in every direction. And so was my heart!
It was also springtime in my heart! I finally exhaled a breath of relief that I have been holding for years!
Our visit with Dr. N was truly a consolation. While Zak worked on his math in the waiting area, I sat on the edge of her couch and poured out my worries. Only a trickle at first (is she going to think I'm paranoid, obsessed, crazy?), then the more she asked questions and nodded with understanding, the less crazy I felt, the more relaxed I got, and at some point, I felt it. The blossom of hope opening just the slightest bit.
She knew what SPD was. She was very familiar with it's symptoms. She clearly connected how certain activities open up pathways for Zak's mind to accomplish what he is so very capable of. She didn't jump to any conclusions. She didn't diagnose. She listened, she heard, she offered support and further analysis, and after visiting with him for a few minutes to introduce herself to him she said he was a pretty cool kid. I wholeheartedly agree!
When we drove to her office that morning, the fog was so thick we couldn't even see the top of the bridge as we drove over the lake. It was so reflective of how I've felt about this as the years go by, like the fog just gets thicker and I can't seem to see anything except exactly where we are in any given moment.
As we drove home, the clouds were starting to lift. At home I told Victor everything, then lay down to nurse Kit and we both fell into a deep sleep for about two hours.
Later, as I drove alone to orchestra practice, I suddenly saw it, felt it, breathed it.
Spring has definitely arrived!
Hi. I'm Celeste, Nancy's daughter. I met you at the orchestra. Jovi told me about your blog. I'm just starting one up. My son Kevin has a speech delay and I'm just starting the process of getting him help. I've read some of your posts and am encouraged by your matter-of-fact approach to your kids' situation and your positive attitude. I'm learning how to blog. It's not as good as yours, but you can check it out if you'd like.
ReplyDeletehttp://toddlerspeechdelay.blogspot.com/
So, so happy for your hope and joy. <3
ReplyDelete